================================================== AAD 26 Method and apparatus for removing the lug nuts by Tom Murphy VII, Ph.D. ================================================== one nothing makes cars more impatient than seeing a bike tune G down 6! (use A string) finger picked chords: E -0----------------------------- a -2-etc---0--------------2------ d -2--------5 -slide-> 2 -4------ g -1--------0-------------4------ b ------------------------3------ e ------------------------2------ slide thing: then xx0213/xx0212 G(barre), G(barre) with open E string Bridge: Bm (walk up high e) xx5070 (slide down) you bought a brand new you-know-what but left it in connecticut you tried to swerve to miss the bus but could not swerve fast enough and wonder why you've got the french guy on your mind and you elide this part of the story and i see you all laid up in the i.c.u. nothing makes a car flip out like seeing a bicycle about what were you mumbling? portuguese or french or something? (must be the morphine) doctor's rushing in could the phrase have been russian? he doesn't understand he's trying to take your pulse again come on doctor get a translator in here I think she said "I love you" in Russian -------------------------------------------------- two open, obvious, barre chords on your next vacation take a trip literally fall I mean autumn take note of my frustration abandon ship literally jump -ing jacks for joy how do you do? so poorly through and through pouring mixed drinks this cocktail really stinks but it's supposed to stink the world's first cheese drink on your next vacation give 'em hell with your new smell literally in hell how do you do that with fondue? pouring mixed drinks this bartender really stinks but he's supposed to stink -------------------------------------------------- three bass, capo 2 or 4, obvious just yesterday I was thinkin' something but it got away like an English muffin cuz 1 am flat 2 dimensions, if that you remarked in the early morning that you're breakfast shaped and you need some warmin' well, I 2 am pancakes no not the kind in volleyball more like a short stack, but not as tall blueberry supreme with the fresh whipped cream is it possible to have too much coffee? doesn't seem so, but maybe it could be? cuz 1 am flat 2 dimensions, if that pancakes are 2D -------------------------------------------------- four label me purple pc 2-===== 4-===-- C 350400 200230 032030 032003 350407 200232 032033 x0220= 032030 =2 35040 ..end on: x0a0c0 =2 G After achieving the singularity, mankind built a machine to judge them. It always reports "purple", the second-lowest rating. put in an-oth- er coin I WON'T it'll label me purple that hurtful machine and the news spoken so easily robotic delivery its bad reviews are sort of a mystery but press the start over key make out the I owe you I DON'T it'll label me purple that hurtful machine we built you in a private voting booth to tell us the awful truth co lor abuse has been your history I press control-alt-delete flatten the bill -------------------------------------------------- five songfight: peace is rest pc 5--===- 044 054 slide to xx7 -2-2 switch: 044 054 320 324 -2-2 044 054 320 32x2 -2-2 chorus: 540055 =20100 x32030 G highpart: always on highest two strings: 57 75 32 35 -2-2 rising: 2= 02 then same old highpart stuff the plumber whines again "peace is rest" is what he said but you can sleep when you are dead! cuz drains are full of gunk flushing's not enough so do your job, and get that thing unclogged or do you want me to call the union up? do not tamper or destroy or place objects that are foreign in the coach class lavatoooory cuz drains are full of stuff passengers are lining up and I know that he'll put down his in-flight meal or do you want me to tell the stewardess? he keeps's saying "peace is rest" go and do your job you can sleep when you are dead just go and do your job -------------------------------------------------- when people tell me that I am a pretty good dancer they usually look surprised or like I should be surprised the dj ought to know this track is kinda slow well I can improvise don't act so surprised I don't need permission to know that I can dance I'll just use my intuition but thanks, man, thanks this move is new to all yinz I learned this one from Sadie Hawkins and when we get to the slow dance it's the same thing at 30bpms I don't need permission to know that I can dance I'll just use my innate wisdom but thanks, man, thanks don't need a proclamation or duran durans my internal narration says dance man dance don't need a decision on whether I can dance I'll just use my seventh vision but thanks, man, thanks I don't need clairvoyance or to take a chance I'll just use flamboyance and dance, man, dance ... -------------------------------------------------- 888. life's a bleach PC 2--===- x00000(+harmonics on xxxCCA) x32000/x32010 57050 07050 x02030 x02000 =2 8AA900 090900(or 09090A) xx2010/xx2000/xx2200/xx2000 =20100 Am 054030 loop. they say that life's a bleach ammonia chloramine i s'pose that's why my eye's are stingin'. I'll just try to keep on singin'. all the while whitening my teeth and smile at the great barrier reef you say payback's a bleach ethylenediamine i s'pose that's why my skin is meltin'. but the one who melt it dealt it. all the while whitening my teeth and I smile at the great barrier reef call of the wild whitening my fang and I smile at the eye irritant -------------------------------------------------- 101010 method and appartus for removing the lug nuts pulled off the road to change a flat felt maladroit gettin out the jack like the DMV had called your bluff not enough light to make repairs there could be rapists anywhere you just can't twist the lug nuts hard enough take me for a ride I can change your flat tire put the wrench on angled just so felt competent let the record show method and apparatus patent pending shift to reverse let off the brake a quarter turn is enough to make the toughest nut to crack start trembling take me for a ride I can change your flat tire when it's dark outside i can start a fire take me for a ride I can change your mind -------------------------------------------------- 111111 tv chef breaks pizza record pc 2-===== obvious You can do it by yourself you can do it without any help like everyone says raise your fists in triumph throwing the dough above your head a famed tv chef moved to the west and broke the pizza record but it wasn't his best the greatest pizza that I ever made ... I made a mistake and I lost my head raising my fists in triumph I threw the sauce instead pizza everywhere my masterpiece was ruined ON THE AIR and though I hold the record it's hard to care -------------------------------------------------- totals done? mix mp3 guess 1. one + * * 2:20 2. literally fall + * * 1:35 3. 2 am pancakes + * * 1:51 4. label me purple + * * 2:03 5. peace is rest + * * 2:16 6. when people tell me that ... + + * 2:01 7. only ___ would rhyme ___ ... ? - * 1:54 8. life's a bleach + * * 2:18 9. vulgar fraction 3/4 ? - * 1:26+ 10. method and apparatus ... + + * 1:43 11. tv chef breaks pizza record + * * 1:30